Meaning of the inconjunct in relationships
Inconjuncts (aspects of 150 degrees) between a couple’s chart positions are difficult to deal with. The inconjunct in synastry makes me think of a seesaw with both parties sitting on one side, trying to get each other up by moving down. In a balanced position there is no fun at all. Depending on the nature of the aspects involved, there is a lack of balance in a certain area of the relationship. I take 2 degrees orb (very small) for the inconjunct. When it comes to signs you may as well take the whole sign as inconjunct (Aries-Scorpio, Aries-Virgo, Taurus-Sagittarius, Taurus-Libra, Gemini-Capricorn, Gemini-Scorpo, etc.) but you need to take into account that there ARE aspects contradicting this ‘verdict’. For example:
– when you find a creative way to solve the problem with the biquintile (144 degrees).
– or when the relationship turns into a sort of an obsession (165 degrees, like between Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise, see http://astrology-love-romance.blogspot.nl/2012/07/divorce-katie-holmes-and-tom-cruise.html)
– or when you have to deal with a frustrating aspect of 157.5 degrees like between Orson Welles and Rita Hayworth http://astrology-love-romance.blogspot.nl/2011/09/famous-couple-orson-welles-and-rita.html
Please understand that it takes more than just one inconjunction to split you up! Princess Margaret and Anthony Armstrong Jones’s synastry contained at least 5 quincunxes and still they got married:).
You don’t NEED a quincunx to separate. The inconjunction simply says that it is hard to stay on each others’ level and still enjoy the interaction. That is why I wanted to show you the picture of a seesaw. Picture that… Try to climb up a seesaw and you will see how easy it is to slide down.
Examples:
– Margareth and Anthony Armstrong Jones ( http://astrology-love-romance.blogspot.nl/2009/06/famous-couples-princess-margaret-and.html ) They have not matching inconjunct signs in the chart, like Sun in Leo – Sun in Pisces, Venus in Libra – Venus in Pisces and an almost exact inconjunct between Mercury in Virgo and Mercury in Aquarius. Too bad, because it makes a problem of communications and they already had different life styles and different preferences.
INCONJUNCT ASPECTS IN SYNASTRY
If there is a Sun inconjunct Sun, you see each other, you are being noticed, but it will be difficult to join life and live as one because there is an intrinsic difference that keeps the both of you on another level unless Venus (love) helps you.
A Moon inconjunct Moon synastry makes it difficult on an emotional level. Your experiences, education and family life just doesn’t match with your partners, even if you try and even if/when you succeed to give each party what they need, you won’t feel at ease completely.
Imagine a Moon inconjunct Saturn synastry. It would be like a family matter to be related to a person who limits your needs and emotional expression or to be related to someone who seems extremely emotional to you, like a child. Maybe this couple calls each other ‘mum and dad’ (even when the children aren’t there).
Mercury inconjunct Mercury synastry signals differences in opinion and the difficulty to get to a common statement, maybe also because of talking but not listening to each other. There is always a difference at a certain level, sometimes the level of an IQ. It is like talking in a disconnected phone when you are face to face. In the seesaw, the couple would be talking chin up, not adjusting to the other one’s position at the time. Examples:
– http://astrology-love-romance.blogspot.nl/2010/10/famous-couples-mariah-carey-tommy.html (Mariah Carey and her Tommy)
– http://astrology-love-romance.blogspot.nl/2009/06/famous-couples-princess-margaret-and.html (Princess Margaret and her Anthony)
A Venus inconjunct Venus synastry is like a little Cupid walking over the seesaw, moving from left to right and vice versa, trying to keep things nice. Still, there is always one who isn’t completely happy with the choices being made. It is an uncomfortable aspect.
Example:
Madonna-Jesus Luz: Sun inconjunct Sun and Venus inconjunct Venus
http://astrology-love-romance.blogspot.nl/2010/02/famous-couples-madonna-and-jesus-luz.html
A Mars inconjunct Mars synastry, IMO, could mirror trying to light a fire with a match that is just to short or a fire that is just to high. The result is getting hurt. This will be specifically difficult in a sexual relationship.
– The Duchess (http://astropost.blogspot.nl/2012/07/duchess-and-astrology.html ) and her lover Charles Grey had a Mars-Mars inconjunct aspect between them. She had to give him up and gave her love baby to his family.
– Brigitte Bardot and Roger Vadim had their Mars in conflicting signs (Leo and Capricorn): http://astrology-love-romance.blogspot.nl/2011/12/famous-couple-brigitte-bardot-and-roger.html
– Charlie Sheen and Brooke Mueller (now divorced):
They had Sun in Virgo and in Leo and that is not a good match. They also had Venus square Venus and Mars inconjunct Mars! So the sunsigns were just part of the problem.
http://astrology-love-romance.blogspot.com/2011/03/famous-couples-charlie-sheen-and-brooke.html
– Paul McCartney and Heather Mills had a Mars inconjunct Mars synastry and we know how that ended: http://astropost.blogspot.nl/2007/11/paul-and-heather-and-their-charts.html
Mars-Mars synastry (fire!) is always tricky when there are no supporting aspects. But the inconjunct beats them all.
SUN INCONJUNCT SYNASTRY WITH MOON AND PLANETS
Sun inconjunct Moon synastry: the need for a person who doesn’t seem to see that need.
Sun inconjunct Venus synastry: loving a person who just doesn’t seem to deserve it.
Sun inconjunct Mars synastry: exaggerated competition and sometimes even aggression. Unhealthy sexual relationship.
Sun inconjunct Jupiter synastry: exaggerated trust and support (sometimes without a reason)
Sun inconjunct Saturn is one of the hardest aspects to deal with. It always takes more than just one aspect and charts should always be seen as a whole, related to circumstances, gender, genes and history or culture, but still I find it a difficult aspect. I already studied Sun inconjunct Saturn synastries:
http://astropost.blogspot.nl/2013/07/sun-saturn-synastry-and-inconjunct.html
Examples were among others: DSK and the chamber maid…; Princess Irene and Hugo Carlos (they divorced) http://astrology-love-romance.blogspot.nl/2010/08/famous-couple-princess-irene-and-prince.html
Also watch the synastry of Sarah Bullock and Jesse James http://astrology-love-romance.blogspot.nl/2010/03/famous-couple-sandra-bullock-jesse.html: Sun inconjunct Saturn synastry!
Sun inconjunct Uranus synastry is what I have with every person born in the ultimate days of January and November. Perhaps you can find some examples of your Uranus inconjunct someone’s Sun? A good example of this aspect is Princess Margaret’s relationship with Anthony Armstrong Jones ( http://astrology-love-romance.blogspot.nl/2009/06/famous-couples-princess-margaret-and.html ) and her Uranus inconjunct his Sun. She only married him after Peter Townsend (the man she loved but couldn’t marry) told her that he was to get married. So it looks like he was a substitute for another guy. Sun inconjunct Uranus reflects the danger of alienation and a loss (end of the relationship).
An example of the romantic but sad Sun-Neptune inconjunct synastry is the story of the love of Maria Callas for Aristoteles Onassis: http://astropost.blogspot.nl/2009/02/astrology-of-maria-callas-and.html He married Jacqueline Bouvier (the widow of John F. Kennedy, the murdered president) and she never got over it. His Neptune is inconjunct her natal Sun. Neptune never seems to see what it really happening and idolizes persons. The pink glasses on (Neptune) and losing it (inconjunct). An overdose of romance and fantasy in a relationship can only be in a relationship with an idol, an ‘angel’ or a picture (of an idol).
MORE VENUS INCONJUNCT SYNASTRY
Venus inconjunct Moon synastry: falling in love with an overdone need to be together.
Venus inconjunct Mars synastry: exaggerated passion, ups and downs, passion getting lost (like on the see saw, up, down, up down and eventually declining). Desire doesn’t match the ‘act’. It takes more to stick together. Another explanation is that both have ‘a passion’ but they don’t share each other’s passion. Passion, after all, isn’t just about sexuality or love. You can have a passion for stamps or a sport or astrology. Your partner has a passion for shopping. And you don’t like that. Overdone passions that don’t match…
– Meryll Streep is a very good example of how to stay married even when the signs of Venus don’t match with Mars at all. But, it were just inconjunct signs, it wasn’t an exact inconjunct aspect: http://astrology-love-romance.blogspot.nl/2009/12/famous-couple-meryl-streep-and-don.html
– The progressed Venus of Queen Sonja was inconjunct the Mars of King Harald of Norway when they met: http://astropost.blogspot.nl/2011/01/love-and-venus-in-progressed-chart.html
Venus inconjunct Jupiter synastry: too much parties, to much fun and ultimately blasé.
Venus inconjunct Saturn synastry: exaggerated sticking like glue, but the glue is sliding and never really fixes the gap between them, even though they are stuck.
From time to time I will add more examples and interpretations here! Suggestion for another look at the synastry inconjunct: http://realastrologers.com/the-inconjunct-in-synastry